Marilyn & Harvey Benson

It is ten years since Alan Benson passed away from Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy and this article is in his memory and a tribute to his parents, Harvey and Marilyn, who came to Israel from Scotland to give him more years to live.

When most people are asked why they choose Israel as a country they wish to live in for the rest of their lives, answers are naturally varied. Many Scots are often asked incredulously by Israelis why they would forsake the scenic beauty of the old country with its unique character to face making aliyah and suffering (their word!) the daily hassles of life in Israel. Well, notwithstanding the weather, (the annual Scottish sunshine is counted in hours and minutes as opposed to days by long suffering inhabitants) there is no real need to detail the attractions for many young and not so young Jews who make Israel their home.
I would like to tell you the story of a couple of dear friends who made that decision but their reasons, sadly, were not the common ones that the enquiring Israeli anticipates. It is a story of courage, determination and, while by no means unique, it is an inspiring one that puts our usual daily moans into perspective.
Harvey Benson and Marilyn Talbot grew up in Glasgow. In fact I count Harvey as my oldest friend. We grew up in Netherlee and my earliest memories are of my pal and I running up and down the road daily...that was until he acquired a super red bogie (go-kart Scots style) and we were the envy of our friends. I also recall a great musical interest with Harvey and we were convinced that the strains of our rendition of Tommy Steele`s ‘Singing The Blues’ were welcomed and enjoyed by our neighbors. Music has played a huge part in Harvey and Marilyn`s lives, but first we go back to the seventies.
Harvey and Marilyn were married in October 1972 and in September 1975 their first child, Alan, was born. A quiet baby, he seemed to all intents and purposes normal and healthy but during a routine checkup a nurse suspected that something was not quite right. Further tests and sometime later he was admitted to hospital where it was finally discovered what was wrong. The dreadful news was that Alan had been born with Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy, a genetic muscle wasting disease affecting male children for which there was no cure. The doctors informed Harvey and Marilyn that as the disease progressed their child would be confined to a wheelchair and his life expectancy would be no further than his early teens. Their devastation at this revelation can only be imagined, not only for Harvey and Marilyn but their families and friends too. Their lives were turned upside down and coping with this tragic situation became a nightmare affecting their daily routines and also their whole attitude to the future. The difficulties of adjusting to this new life can only be imagined and the arrival of a second child, Susan, added to the couple`s already 'turned upside down' lives. What should have been a wonderfully happy period for them was clouded by their utter devastation at what had happened to Alan. But what choices do we have in these circumstances but to press on and look to the future, no matter how fearful that then seemed?
With support from family and friends and a renewed interest in music that they had always loved playing and participating in, they faced the future with uncertainty but much love from all who shared their lives.
Musically, Harvey and Marilyn had always been active in the past...Marilyn sang regularly in a choir and Harvey in a jazz band, having drummed in his teens. Who can forget the Harlem Shuffle playing at the Pop Inn at the Tudor in the 60s! But music at this particular time offered only solace and comfort from the sadness that had taken over their lives. Not surprisingly though, with Alan and Susan to care for, their hands were full and time for their great hobby was obviously restricted. Another daughter, Victoria, was born and life continued, but as Alan`s disease progressed each Scottish winter became harder and harder for the Bensons. A warmer climate became a necessity, and hearing of the Alyn Hospital in Jerusalem where similarly afflicted children were being treated, they made enquiries.
It was music in fact that changed the course of their lives. Marilyn volunteered as an accompanist and through her choir she took part in an amazing performance to celebrate Yom Haatzmaut involving the Glasgow Jewish community. This event triggered interest in visiting Israel and even settling there, the benefits to Alan being a huge incentive. Making aliyah proved extremely troublesome however with many obstacles and objections put in their way by Israeli authorities. But the determination of the family won through and they travelled from Glasgow in July 1986.
They began their new lives at the absorption center in Gilo, Jerusalem, which was close to the Alyn Hospital where Alan underwent differing treatments according to the progress of his illness. As life gradually settled and a little leisure time became available, their musical interest returned and contact was made with local musicians and groups.
Moving to Hod Hasharon where they still live, Harvey and Marilyn struggled against the normal hardships entailed in settling in a new country, but these paled into insignificance compared to the heartbreak of Alan`s illness. Throughout these times music inspired the whole family including Alan who had a wonderful sense of rhythm.
After years of loving care, sadly, Alan passed away in March 2001 at the age of 25. This tragedy will stay with the family forever. However they gain comfort from the fact that they had many more years of Alan than they could have dared hope for had the family remained in Scotland.
Life has to go on as we all know and the whole family can be proud of how they have coped and, more importantly, continued to thrive in Israel where they have discovered happiness albeit due to heartbreaking circumstances. They have pursued their musical interests and now have their own music group, PJ Ensemble or Pzazz, as they are known in Israeli music circles. Five musical talents make up the group and their style is that of the classic old time swing and blues artistes like Duke Ellington, Benny Goodman and Sophie Tucker to name but three. Check You Tube for samples of their obvious talent.
In conclusion, the family made the right decision to make aliyah, not least for the benefits to Alan and the extra years they gained loving him and caring for him.
They can`t find the words to express the gratitude they have for their families, friends, volunteer organizations and health services that assisted them over the years.
They remain the warmest and friendliest of people despite the heartache they have gone through and I just wanted to take this opportunity to wish my friends well and remind them this year just ten years after dear Alan`s passing of the warm welcome always awaiting them back in the old country. 

Sam Sinclair is a retired Turf Accountant which is the term his mother preferred to use rather than the more accurate `bookie’! He now dabbles online as gamekeeper turned poacher and is more fascinated with the mathematics of gambling rather than the actual pastime itself. He lives in Glasgow, Scotland.